REVIEW OF HYPE MFP

CAFFEINE CONTENT: 80 MILLIGRAMS PER 8 OUNCE CAN.

RATING: 6.1 OUT OF 10. 

     There are very few energy drinks that I have wanted to try for years. One of them is Hype, and fortunately for me, a little miracle occurred a week ago. I received a generous email from Hype notifying me about samples. I instantaneously jumped on board and accepted the samples. When it arrived the mail, I was absolutely flabbergasted by the impeccable product display. Each can was placed in its own little section, in a beautiful and elegant black box. The first flavor I pulled out was Hype MFP. So, without further ado, let's get right into the taste.

     Hype MFP comes in a sleek and sophisticated carbon fiber can. Unfortunately, the can isn't actually made of carbon fibre, but the design is still pretty cool. I've always wanted to try this because back in 2007, Energy Drink Ratings gave this a 9.7 for taste. Would I agree? No. I wouldn't. In fact, I am extremely disappointed, almost frustrated. No one is going to agree with me on this but I think it tastes very similar to Red Bull. You obviously do not concur with that, so the comment section is open for you to voice your strong disagreement and disapproval. I really wish I thought it didn't taste like Red Bull, but to me it just does! That is just incredibly frustrating. Hopefully the original Hype will be better.

     So, the flavor was a bit frustrating, but how is the blend? Well, it has taurine, caffeine, glucuronolactone, guarana extract, inositol, niacin, pantothenic acid, vitamin b2, vitamin b6, and vitamin b12. The caffeine content is rated at a modest 80 milligrams per 8 ounce can.

     Since this can is only 8 ounces and the caffeine content isn't that extreme, I wasn't expecting a whole lot of effectiveness from this. Obviously, I was correct. Due to my high caffeine tolerance, this barely put a dent in me. However, this should provide a relatively decent kick for a modest consumer. I am not sure how widely distributed it is, but if you see any at your grocery store, don't be afraid to pick it up.

     As it turns out, the first flavor of the drink I've always wanted to try turned out to be a bit of a disappointment. I really wanted it to taste like something unique and different, but to me it only tasted like Red Bull. Hype did regain some points for its decent energy blend, and the effectiveness should be pretty modest. I am eagerly looking forward to reviewing the original Hype to see if it is any better.

REVIEW OF LEAN PURP

CAFFEINE CONTENT: NONE.

RATING: 8.5 OUT OF 10. 


     As much as I enjoy my caffeine and energy drinks, sometimes it's nice to just unwind with a large, sugary can of anti-energy drink. When people think of anti-energy drinks, Drank is the first drink that comes to mind. Now, I have had the opportunity to try Drank, but I have failed to put up a review. Fortunately for you guys, I have recently acquired a drink that is extremely similar to the ever-so-popular Drank. But before I get into the review, here's a little background information. Lean, the drink I will be reviewing today, is supposed to mimic the street drug Sizzurp. Sizzurp is a disgusting and deadly combination consisting of prescription cough syrup (codeine and promethazine), sprite or mountain dew, and a jolly ranchers. So there you have it, onto the review!

     Lean's can design reminds me of Drank's so much, that I could swear they almost look identical. Let's hope the flavor isn't identical as well. Despite being both grape flavored, Lean is much thicker than Drank. As a matter of fact, Lean is so viscous that it is nearly impossible to chug, but that's the whole idea behind this drink. They really wanted it to be a legal alternative to a disgusting street drug. And I am perfectly fine with that. I mean, who doesn't want to drink a think, sugary, syrupy grape soda.

     So what are Lean's relaxation ingredients of choice? Well, looking at the back of the can, I detected unknown amounts of the following: rose hips extract, valerian root extract, and melatonin. Melatonin is the caffeine of anti-energy drinks. This is the ingredient that truly makes it work. I just wish they would tell me how much melatonin is in here.

     Due to this being somewhat of a live review, I haven't actually finished the whole can. However, I am pretty close and I can successfully report that I feel the effects of the drink already. I can also tell you that I have consumed this drink a couple weeks ago and I was more than satisfied with the results. This drink really does put a nice slow to your roll, and I had trouble staying up past eleven o'clock. If you want to go into extreme relaxation mode, I suggest you give this a try.

     Overall, I was impressed with Lean's performance. The flavor is satisfactory, although the high viscosity levels can get a little annoying at times. However, once you finish the can and the effects start to kick in, you won't be disappointed. I can honestly say that Lean is one of the most effective anti-energy drinks I have ever tried. 

REVIEW OF NAWGAN TAROCCO ORANGE

CAFFEINE CONTENT: 100 MILLIGRAMS PER 11.5 OUNCE CAN.

RATING: 7.1 OUT OF 10.

     I would be lying if I told you that I loved testing functional beverages. The reason? It is simply too difficult to figure out if they were effective or not. If a drink is advertised to boost memory, I don't want to have to take a memory test to figure out if it worked or not. Energy drinks are so much more simple, and don't require a lot of testing. Unfortunately for me, I have to review yet another functional beverage. It goes by the name of Nawgan, and it is marketed to enhance concentration and focus. Great! Now I'm going to have to take some standardized concentration test to see if it works. Anyway, enough bullcrap, here's my thoughts.

     Nawgan presents itself with a simple, clean design that is reminiscent to drinks like Brain Toniq. Nawgan comes in three distinct flavors: Red Berry, Tarocco Orange, and Berry. For this review, I will be checking out the Tarocco Orange flavor. Now, before I get into the flavor profile, I would really like to know what a Tarocco Orange is. After a quick Google search, I discovered that a Tarocco Orange is simply a type of blood orange, which is just an orange with blood-colored flesh. The actual flavor is difficult to describe without saying it tastes like blood orange juice. I suppose it is similar to traditional orange juice, but with something different, something I can't put my finger on. Well, whether I can thoroughly describe it or not, I am a fan of this flavor.

     Since Nawgan is classified as a functional beverage, I'm sure we'll be seeing some interesting ingredients in this one. Here's the list: 250 milligrams of citicoline, alpha-glyceryl phosphoryl choline, lycopene, 100 milligrams of caffeine, and d-alpha tocopheryl acetate. I have absolutely no idea what benefits those ingredients have on my brain, but you'll find out what happened in the next section of the review. As for the blend, I think it's pretty solid.

     Here comes the most challenging part of the review. Did this supposed "brain-booster" work? As always, it's difficult to tell, but what I can tell you is that the solid 100 milligrams of caffeine will provide an adequate uplift to your energy levels. Of course, I didn't find this drink to be very effective as an energy drink since my caffeine tolerance is so high. Nevertheless, it should do the trick for the average consumer.

     Overall, it looks like Nawgan is just another functional beverage trying to make a name for themselves in this rapidly growing market. The flavor is pleasing and smooth, but it just doesn't make me stand up and say "wow". The blend is probably the highlight of this drink. With all of those fancy brain boosting ingredients, it feels very scientific. As for the drinks effectiveness, it is extremely difficult to tell whether or not this gave my brain a much-needed boost. I wonder if I can find that standardized concentration test I mentioned earlier.

REVIEW OF AMP SUGAR FREE

CAFFEINE CONTENT: 160 MILLIGRAMS PER 16 OUNCE CAN.

RATING: 6.2 OUT OF 10.


     I find it appalling, yet somehow perfectly logical and reasonable that the only Amp flavor I have yet to review is Sugar Free. And while it not an entirely different flavor, I still consider it to be different than the original Amp and should therefore review it. Based on a review by Energy Fiend, Amp Sugar Free has been improved, although the enhancements appear to be relatively marginal. This certainly would not be my first review choice, but I really needed to review something, so here goes nothing.

     Typically, when a company removes the sugar from a drink that should actually have sugar and replaces it with artificial sweeteners, it should taste awkwardly sweet and, well, artificial. Therefore, since Amp is made by Mountain Dew, I suspected it would taste similar to Diet Mountain Dew, which is one of my favorite diet sodas. As it turns out, my educated prediction was mostly accurate. It had a similar flavor to Diet Mountain Dew, but with a twist. It may have been that it was sweeter or it may just be that Amp tastes slightly different and Mountain Dew and therefore Amp Sugar Free tastes slightly different than Diet Mountain Dew. Either way, the sugar free version of the Mountain Dew on steroids has a respectable flavor.

     Now it's time to check out what lies under the hood of this amped up energy drink: 200 percent daily value of riboflavin, 200 percent daily value of niacin, 200 percent daily value of pantothenic acid, 296 milligrams of taurine, 284 milligrams of maltodextrin, 252 milligrams of guarana seed extract, 160 milligrams of caffeine, and 12 milligrams of panax ginseng extract. Amp's blend definitely needs some work. Why even bother with 12 milligrams of ginseng, or 296 milligrams of taurine (most drinks have 2,000 milligrams). Amp really needs to step their game up to compete with the best energy drinks.

     If you have been following my site for the best month or so, this is going to sound ridiculously repetitive. These types of energy drinks simply do not have the same effectiveness as they used to. This is due to the increase in my caffeine tolerance. Fortunately, I can tell you whether or not the standard consumer would be effected by this drink. My educated prediction is that it would produce a kick that is a step above Red Bull, but still not on par with a Rockstar or Monster. As for me, the effectiveness was fair at best, and it didn't really satisfy my needs. Truth be told, if I want a drink that can get me going, I'll go for a Spike Shooter.

      Amp's attempt at making a Sugar Free drink is certainly respectable, but it just doesn't have enough attributes to really push it at the top of the podium. While the flavor is easily palatable, I have had much better (and much worse) sugar free energy drinks. As with the energy blend and effectiveness, Amp has never really been the greatest at producing a solid and effective product. With that said, I believe I will pass on this one. Now, where's my Monster Lo-Carb?