REVIEW OF REALIFE

CAFFEINE CONTENT: 80 MILLIGRAMS PER 0.34 OUNCE TUBE.


RATING: 7.5 OUT OF 10.


So here we have another product in the awesome category of additives. It's called Realife, a professionally developed product extremely similar to Energy Catalyst. The only difference is, Realife is simply water and caffeine. Where as Energy Catalyst was water, caffeine, flavor, and B12. Realife comes in a great looking box that would appeal to a much more mature crowd. Most likely, anyone over 30 is Realife's target market. Now, let's talk about what an energy additive is. Energy additives are possibly the coolest energy products on the market. You simply add the liquid to any drink and it instantly makes your drink caffeinated. Realife will add a moderate 80 milligrams to your favorite beverage. It did take some thinking to decide what I should put it in. Finally, I settled for some cranberry-pomegranate juice. I poured about 10 or so ounces of juice into a glass and squeezed in the additive. Instantly, my juice had as much caffeine as a Red Bull. Amazing, isn't it? And you wanna know something even more amazing? It didn't effect the flavor at all. I gave some to my mother and she failed to notice any difference as well. But you have to watch out though. I wouldn't recommend putting it in something bland like cheerios or milk. Of course I've never tried Realife on those things so I could just be blowing smoke. I may as well just skip the energy ingredients section because all it contains is purified water and 80 milligrams of natural caffeine, presumably from coffee beans. This will make your favorite non-caffeinated drink have as much caffeine as a Red Bull. It will also make your favorite energy drink stronger. Say you like Monster but you don't get a buzz from it. With Realife, the caffeine content goes from 160 milligrams to 240. It will make Coca-Cola have 114 milligrams of caffeine, and Mountian Dew would have 135 milligrams. And it really doesn't need to stop at drinks. Think your soup needs a little something-something? Add about 3 of these bad boys and your pot of soup instantly gets a 240 milligram jolt. That should keep the family going. Pasta sauce acts the same way. Add 2 of these to your favorite pasta sauce and it instantly has as much caffeine as two Red Bulls. So, the real question is does it work? Not really. Not unless you put it in something that is already caffeinated. And I'm not talking about some Monster or Starbucks Coffee, more like Green Tea or Coca-Cola. Come to think of it, Green Tea would be better with 105 milligrams of caffeine. In short, my alertness didn't increase by a whole lot, and the effect was difficult to notice. But I still love these products, I still love them a lot. 7.5 out of 10.

REVIEW OF CHARGERS

CAFFEINE CONTENT: UNKNOWN.


RATING: 8.6 OUT OF 10.


Chocolate covered espresso beans, oh how I love thee. It's really the only time where eating coffee beans becomes acceptable. I mean, let's face it, if you saw someone munching on coffee beans straight from the bag, you would give them a second glance. And yes, coffee beans are indeed edible. So if your too lazy to make your coffee, then just pop a dozen beans and get going. You'll put the new 5 Hour Energy commercials to shame. I admit that I have tried straight coffee beans and I felt like the biggest caffeine junkie on the face of the earth. Still, I absolutely adore chocolate covered coffee beans. From Crackheads to Shock-A-Lots, these caffeinated goodies can keep anyone going. And now my chocolate covered coffee bean fetish is met once again with Chargers chocolate covered espresso beans. The beans come in a red tin designed to look like a battery. The packaging is very nice and it's also a great place to keep your change. The plastic overwrap is incredibly easy to pull off, but the top is a different story. I struggled for several minutes and finally resorted to that one mechanism that opens bottles that are closed too tightly. I've never figured out the name of that mechanism, but it has always come in handy. The beans inside are red, much like the tin. There is about 8 beans in one tin, making about 160 milligrams of caffeine, give or take. Popping one in my mouth, I am sad to say that the red coating has no flavor whatsoever. Nevertheless, the espresso beans are downright awesome. Filled with the delicious combination of chocolate and coffee. And as I'm writing this review, I'm thinking to myself, why don't I just make my own chocolate covered coffee beans. How hard could it be? If I sound like a big caffeine junkie to you, it's because I am. If I never got "hooked" on caffeine, this glorious blog would have never existed. But that's beside the point, back to the review. There is really no need to dive into the energy blend, because there simply is none. Just straight up trimethylxanthine. That's caffeine to you. After munching on these for about 30 seconds, because that's how long it took me to scarf them down, I did find a moderate increase in alertness. It's nothing too potent, but it's a great alternative if you can't wait for the liquid version of coffee. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to look up that recipe for chocolate covered coffee beans. 8.6 out of 10.

REVIEW OF MANA POTION

Courtesy of Gizmodo

CAFFEINE CONTENT: 160 MILLIGRAMS PER 1.35 OUNCE BOTTLE.


RATING: 7.3 OUT OF 10.


Straight from the heart of Harcos Laboratories, comes the magic potion all gamers dream about. Loaded with energy ingredients and enzymes, the Mana Health potion is one of the coolest energy products around. It's packaging is downright awesome, right up there with Zombie Blood. Just gaze at the photograph and you'll see what I mean. It looks like something that came out of World of Warcraft or Legend of Zelda. The liquid inside is a greenish color. Taking a sip I get a very sweet and delicious flavor that is actually quite enjoyable for a shot. The flavor is very hard to pinpoint but I can tell you that it is very sweet and good. You should have no problem slamming this down in seconds. So what exactly powers this awesome product? Well, it has 80 percent daily value of vitamin b1, 130 percent daily value of vitamin b3, 80 percent daily value of pantothenic acid, 1,600 percent daily value of vitamin b6, 6,667 percent daily value of vitamin b12, and a 2,000 milligram energy blend consisting of glucuronolactone, malic acid, dl-phenylalanine, l-taurine, n-acetyl, l-tyrosine, and caffeine. I'm not finished yet. It also has a 400 microgram enzyme blend consisting of amylase, lactase, cellulase, lipase, and protease. The caffeine content is a blistering 160 milligrams per 1.35 ounce bottle. Now, I've seen several energy shots with enzymes, and I've always wanted to know what an enzyme was. According to Wikipedia, Enzymes are proteins that increase or decrease the rates of chemical reactions. Now I really understand why they're in energy products. I actually had no idea that's what they did. With my HP getting boosted +160, I expected a great boost. Sadly, the great boost never came. I felt a little more awake but it was nothing over the top. It's hard to tell how long it lasted because it never really came on at all. Sometimes I wish I didn't have such a tolerance to caffeine. I should walk in to Starbucks, order a quadruple shot caramel macchiato and see what happens. Anyway, Mana Potion is still awesome. It has a great flavor, an awesome energy blend, but a poor kick. I'll give it a 7.3 out of 10.

REVIEW OF MAD CROC CHEWS

CAFFEINE CONTENT: 80 MILLIGRAMS PER PACK.


RATING: 7.7 OUT OF 10.


Yesterday, I had a friend come over and never had a chance to write a review. So today, I will be tackling Saturday's review along with Sunday's. For Saturday's review, we have Mad Croc Energy Chews. These Starbursts on steroids come in a pack of 10 with three flavors: orange, lemon, and strawberry. Each chew is individually wrapped. The chews are easy to unwrap and are much softer than a Starburst. Popping one in my mouth, I get a soft texture with a nice, artificial fruit flavor. The flavor, of course, depends on the flavor of the chew. I personally don't have a favorite, but I can tell you that I wasn't the biggest fan of the lemon flavor. Overall though, Mad Croc Energy Chews did a pretty nice job in the taste department. All right, Mad Croc is powered by 50 percent daily value of riboflavin, 100 percent daily value of niacin, 100 percent daily value of vitamin b6, 100 percent daily value of vitamin b12, 75 percent daily value of pantothenic acid, 80 milligrams of caffeine, and taurine. All of these goodies come with 200 calories and 35 grams of sugar. Now in order to get the 80 milligrams of caffeine in your system, you have to eat all 10 chews. This is not an easy thing to do. If you've ever tried to eat 10 Starbursts before, you probably have noticed that it's actually a little difficult. After about 3 chews, the sweetness gets to you and you have to stop for a few minutes. Eventually, I did eat all 10 and the kick is comparable to an average 8 ounce energy drink or coffee. It's a decent buzz that lasts a few hours and goes away without a crash. I even had some energy to go outside and test out my lowered basketball hoop. And by the way, I had no idea dunking was so difficult. Maybe it's just me, but I will release it too soon and the ball will bounce of the rim. Anyway, I digress. Mad Croc Energy Chews are a pretty nice product with a great flavor and decent kick. 7.7 out of 10.

REVIEW OF PLOW ON

CAFFEINE CONTENT: 100 MILLIGRAMS PER PIECE.


RATING: 8.2 OUT OF 10.


Energy Gums have done pretty well on my site, apart from Jolt Gum which didn't work and Power Play which tasted terrible. Now it's time to take on Plow On. I received three packages of the new-and-improved Plow On Energy Gum. Two of them American and the other a Russian flavor. I will be tackling the American flavor today. This is the same type of gum as Power Play and Stay Alert. It basically looks like a blue Mentos. I popped one in my mouth and sucked on it for a few moments. Now this the new-and-improved flavor, so I expected it to perform well in the taste category, and I wasn't disappointed. When I did bite into it, the gum broke apart but only slightly and the flavor was actually pretty good. There is no flavor listed on the package, but I would say it's a slight minty flavor. There is a little bitterness, but then again it does have 100 milligrams of caffeine per piece. And the energy blend doesn't stop there. Plow On also contains 10 milligrams of taurine, 5 milligrams of green tea extract,  and 5 milligrams of ginseng. So it does have the energy blend standards, albeit in small amounts. Caffeine is what powers this gum. And not many gums contain as much caffeine as Plow On. Off the top of my head, I can only think of one energy gum that contains as much caffeine as this: Stay Alert. And that was developed for the military. After chewing Plow On for about 10 or 15 minutes, I did notice an increase in my energy levels. Two pieces would have done more of the trick, but I stuck with one. There was also no crash at all. Overall, Plow On is a pretty nice gum. Yes, the flavor could be improved, but not by much. I'll give it a solid 8.2 out of 10.

REVIEW OF ZOMBIE BLOOD

Courtesy of Think Geek

CAFFEINE CONTENT: 80 MILLIGRAMS PER 3.4 OUNCE PACKET.


RATING: 7.6 OUT OF 10.


Zombies have become a huge part of Internet culture over the past few years. Movies like Zombieland, and books like Zombie Survival Guide are just a few examples of Zombie Culture.  Now though, Harcos Laboratories has created a new chapter in Zombieism. Zombie Blood. The packaging is simply awesome. It comes in a packet that looks exactly like a blood packet except it's filled with green zombie blood. If I rated packaging, I would give it a 10. Anyway, it took me forever to open Zombie Blood. I even resorted to using scissors would resulted in quite the debacle with some spilling. Thankfully, my friend managed to get it open and we managed to get most of the liquid inside. The color is a think, opaque, fluorescent green. If you've ever played House of the Dead 2, the zombie blood is the same color. It's pretty awesome. I didn't think the flavor would be that great but Harcos did a pretty nice job with it. It tasted just like a lime flavored candy. If you like lime flavored candy, you should have no trouble liking this. It is quite sweet and good. Alright, so I've actually never seen the energy blend for this drink, so let's check it out together. We've got an 880 milligram energy blend consisting of d-glucuronolactone, l-phenylalanine, n-acetyl, l-tyrosine, glucose, caffeine, and dl-phenylalanine. I haven't quite finished yet though. It also has a 425 microgram enzyme blend which consists of amylase, lactase, cellulase, lipase, and protease. So the blend is nothing too substantial, but its got your basics. Well, except for taurine. With 80 milligrams of caffeine (the same as Red Bull), the drink provided a decent kick. Not the strongest on the market by any means, but still pretty good. And with products like this, do you really buy them for the kick? No. You buy them because they look awesome. And they taste pretty good. Overall, I have a fan of Zombie Blood. Novelty-wise I would give it a solid 47, but energy drink-wise I give it a 7.6 out of 10.

REVIEW OF HED

CAFFEINE CONTENT: UNKNOWN.


RATING: 5.1 OUT OF 10.


Over the course of less than 2 years, I've tried over 200 energy drinks. So when an energy drink comes along that I've never heard of, that's saying something. This particular energy drink is called High Energy Drink (HED for short) and it is marketed as a cheaper Red Bull alternative. The label is quite generic and it looks like the sort of drink that I would find at Big Lots for 60 cents. It also has a corny slogan, "Feel It". And then it says "with taurine" in all capital letters. Wow! With taurine? I wonder how many energy drinks have taurine in them? Oh yeah, almost every single one of them. So the packaging is definitely sub-par in my opinion, but I don't grade packaging. I grade taste, blend, and kick. The taste part is actually pretty good. It tastes exactly like Red Bull, maybe a little bit more sour. If you don't know what Red Bull tastes like, I suggest you try some. The only thing I can say is that it has an apple-ish flavor, but not like carbonated apple juice, along with a medicinal flavor. Not bad, and I had no trouble drinking the whole can. The energy blend has all your favorites, of course. Here's the list: 40 percent daily value of niacin, 40 percent daily value of vitamin b6, 40 percent daily value of vitamin b12, 40 percent daily value of pantothenic acid, and a 1,650 milligram proprietary blend consisting of taurine, glucuronolactone, and inositol. Caffeine is here as well, although I don't know how much. I would assume it would be 80 milligrams since this is a Red Bull clone, but I can't be certain. The overall blend isn't too bad, though. It's got some of your energy drink staples like taurine and inositol. This drink does come in a bigger 16 ounce version, but I tried the 8 ounce version instead since Red Bull is 8 ounces and this is a Red Bull alternative. So the million dollar question is, does it work? In short, no. Not at all. I drank a can of High Energy Drink and felt no boost in my alertness or energy. It actually made me feel even more tired. Still, there is a 16 ounce version which would deliver twice the caffeine and may do the trick. The 8 ounce version didn't effect me at all. Period. So all things considered, this is a pretty average drink, maybe even mediocre. I'll give it a 5.1 out of 10. The taste and energy blend was a 7.4 and a 7 respectively. The kick rating was a 1, so the average is 5.1 out of 10.

Update: The 16 ounce version does provide a noticeable kick. I recommend buying that one instead.